Book Tag: What’s On My Bookshelf?

I didn’t really get many things posted last week, and if you care at all, one way or the other (hopefully you weren’t happy I was gone) I’m truly sorry (but also not really.)

Sometimes that’s how it’s going to go around here – little mini breaks because I’m an adult and I can do what I want! Maybe next time I’ll post a Gone Fishin’ sign, though.

I don’t really have a good excuse for my inactivity other than I am really trying to get a few books read quickly so I can queue up some more reviews for this month. But also, I binged The Staircase on Netflix really hard.

Like, it was kind of pathetic how hard of a binge I did. I barely moved. My Fitbit thought I was sleeping for 14 hours. No joke.

But I’m back on it for this week! And the lovely Emily over at Wicked Good Reads is even helping me out with some content by tagging me in for this bookish questionnaire.

Is it good? Define ‘good.’ Is it content? You’re damn right it’s content!

Image result for new light john mayer gif

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Booknerd Wednesday: This Is Not A Safe Space

Hey Nerdos! How’s the mildly inflammatory post title hitting you?

Right in the nads, I hope.

But, seriously, how’s life? I’m honestly interested. I need to know. Tell me about yourselves, tell me what’s going on. Because I’m always telling you about my life, like maybe to an overtly personal degree, as if this isn’t a book blog at all.

So, let’s make this uncomfortableness a two-way street.

awkward andy samberg GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine

This week is crazy busy for me. There’s so much going on at home, from preparing for a 15th birthday party for the stepkid, to cleaning out the other stepkid’s room because he moved out and I want my goddamn office space, to trying to build and stain our Adirondack chairs because it was cheaper to DIY-it than to buy them ready-to-sit and I’m all about DIY where I can if it saves me more money for books.

PS. whoever decided that Willy Wonka Funko dolls are worth $50 can get bent. You’ve ruined a teen’s birthday wish!

Anyway, through it all, I’m super dedicated to getting some books read and putting some half-assed content up on this clearly amateur blog.

Today’s BW post is going to be a personal book blogging existential crisis experience. That sounds like a blasty-blast, right?

I’m going to be working through a thing, so just bear with me and feel free to let me know your opinions in the comments.

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Review: Missing, Presumed (DS Manon, #1) by Susan Steiner

★★

If you’ve ever thought to yourself “what would Bridget Jones be like as a homicide detective?” …then I think you’ll want to read this book.

I myself have never wandered about Bridget Jones taking on different career paths, (really she does enough of that in her own stories,) but now that I have some idea of what a DS Jones would look like, I’ll tell you, it doesn’t work.

Missing, Presumed in the first book in the DS Manon Bradshow series – a UK police procedural revolving around the disappearance of the twenty-something daughter of a prominent doctor.

Overall I found this to be severely lacking on the police procedural part and overwrought on the personal “character-study” side, like to such annoying degree that I’m physically disappointed by this book. It’s certainly not what it was presented to be on the jacket or in the blurbs.

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Review: The Fifth To Die (A 4MK Thriller, #2) by J.D. Barker

★★★★½

This is what you have to know going into the 4MK series:

This story is a marathon, not a sprint.

And I’m not just talking about this particular book, number two in the series.

J.D. Barker has crafted a rich, intricate world full of robust, personality-driven characters, and advanced story telling technique. And he is presenting it to us, the reader, one giant novel at a time.

You don’t get conclusions around here. There is no end until it ends.

It’s a train that never stops. It is always moving towards the next destination in this 4MK world where you’ll be given new threads and new clues and new revelations that puts one more puzzle piece into the jumbled picture that is Anson Bishop and Detective Porter.

This series is detailed, not so much in visual description, but in depth of narrative and connections. They are flying all over the place, from past to present, from case to case. It could be too much maybe for some readers, but for me, it filled me with joy at how vast this puzzle really is.

And I don’t want to oversell this, but HOLY SHIT, YOU GUYS, IT’S THE GREATEST THING OUT THERE RIGHT NOW ON THE FACE OF THE EARTH.

…yeah, that feels like the right amount of cap locks.

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Booknook Sunday: 05.27.18

Happy Sunday, nerdos!

This is Booknook Sunday – my one day to talk about home design as it relates to books and my own life.

I’ve had a long past couple of weekends with some reno projects, so I haven’t been able to post booknook decor as much as I intended to, but the good news is, we finally finished renovating our foyer/front hall closet (it only took six weeks!) and even painted the upstairs hallway. I took a queue from Dita Von Teese and went with a deep purple just like her personal library. My husband hates it but I don’t give a shit…

*bats eyelashes*

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Book Tag: Emotions in Colours

My girl Greyson, over at Greyson Reads, tagged me to do this original gem created by Cait @ Paper Fury, which was inspired by a couple of G’s other blog posts. It’s colours as emotions as related to books.

It’s like our very own booknerd version of Emotion-evoked Synesthesia. (Google it, it’s pretty cool.)

Of course, I will never experience Synesthesia because, I’ll be honest, I’m pretty dead on the inside. This tag could end up being exceptionally difficult for me, but I’ll usually try anything once – even emotions.

Once.

empty kate mckinnon GIF by Saturday Night Live

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Review: Dark Game (DI Kelly Porter, #1) by Rachel Lynch

★★★

Welcome to another edition of Krystin Struggles To Write A Review For A Book That Was Just Okay!

These are my least favourite reviews to write. I think I’m a person who creatively operates best under strong swings on the emotional spectrum. Writing a review for a book that didn’t get me fired up either way is kind of like being asked “how was your weekend?” by an expectant colleague and struggling to come up with an answer because all you did was lay around in your PJs mindlessly watching repeats of Live PD.

That Dan Abrams sure does like him some tightly fit sweaters. And I am not complaining.

I don’t know, guys… Do you want to talk about this book or do you want to talk about Dan Abrams’ wardrobe? I’m leaning more towards wardrobe. Blue is really his colour.

Alright, alright! I’ll stop.

yas checking out GIF by Vanessa Marie Carter

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Review: When The Serpent Bites (The Starks Trilogy, #1) by Nesly Clerge

★

This must be “Krystin reads nothing but misogynistic stories” month, because this is my second in a row, and let me tell you, I’m fucking over it.

I’ll give this review some context real fast. Frederick Starks – a very rich, successful businessman – is married with three kids. His wife, Kayla, is unfaithful to him. They separate. One night, while driving aimlessly, ruminating on the state of his failed marriage, he pulls up to the house of the man Kayla cheated with and beats the shit out of him in front of the man’s wife and children, putting the man into a coma. Police arrive, Starks is caught red-handed, quite literally, and is arrested. He goes to trial and is found guilty.

Because, duh.

But for some reason Starks just can’t believe the jury convicted him. Basically his whole position on his guilt is: “my wife cheated, and the guy was mean to me, so I can’t be held responsible for my actions.”

In fact, at his trial, the defence mounted by his attorney is nothing more than a character assassination of Kayla because “she’s a whore“, as if that’s a legit reason to nearly kill a man.

give me a break judging you GIF by Originals

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Review: The Last Mrs. Parrish by Liv Constantine

★

“What we’ve got here is a failure to communicate.”

This quote from the 1967 film, COOL HAND LUKE, basically sums up how I’m feeling after reading this book. And I’ve never even seen the movie. The quote just came to me, as a thing I know somehow, deep from within the pop culture recesses of my mind. There’s a lot of useless information in there.

I might also go with: “…in the galaxy of This Sucks Camel Dicks!” Stepbrothers, 2008.

What I mean to say is: I wish the publishers hadn’t stuffed this novel into the psychological-thriller genre just because that’s where all the cool kids are, and had instead been honest about what this book is: a dark romance meets women’s fiction meets soap opera intrigue with a terrible, TERRIBLE message.

It’s not a thriller. I’m sorry, but no. I am not thrilled.

Had I known this from the start, I would have passed on reading it, because this level of dramatic soap-opera nutty-ness is just not my thing. It lacks humour and humanity, and is overpopulated with terrible one-liners, cliches and silly dialogue and tropes that feel like a reenactment. And the writing is derivative and basic.

Not to mention, the internal misogyny that permeates the entire theme gets my feminist hackles up.

Anyway….I didn’t know I shouldn’t read this, so I did, and now I have library late fees and a shitty review to write, so buckle in, bitches.

(This could get mildly spoiler-y because I’m going to rant, so if you’re super excited to read this, here’s my takeaway: Don’t waste your time with this, unless you’re cool with domestic abuse. Otherwise, read on!)

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Book Tag: The Ultimate Book Tag – 25 Bookish Questions

IT’S FRIDAY!

ken block friday GIF by Ford

Bonus for me: I’ve got Monday off work. I’m determined to make this weekend super productive for reading! It’s top priority.

I’d say last night was pretty productive for reading, as well, because I literally had no other choice. When I got home from work around 5PM, the power was out at my house, as well at 223 other houses. And we didn’t get electricity back until this morning! Joy-of-fucking-joys!

I felt like an Amish person – lighting candles, walking around in the dark, crying that we have no Wi-Fi (Amish people cry about that, right?)

As expressed by my 14-year-old stepkid: “I want to look at memes! This sucks!”

I hear you, junior.

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