Review: Dark Game (DI Kelly Porter, #1) by Rachel Lynch

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★★★

Canelo | 2018

Welcome to another edition of Krystin Struggles To Write A Review For A Book That Was Just Okay!

These are my least favourite reviews to write. I think I’m a person who creatively operates best under strong swings on the emotional spectrum. Writing a review for a book that didn’t get me fired up either way is kind of like being asked “how was your weekend?” by an expectant colleague and struggling to come up with an answer because all you did was lay around in your PJs mindlessly watching repeats of Live PD.

That Dan Abrams sure does like him some tightly fit sweaters. And I am not complaining.

I don’t know, guys… Do you want to talk about this book or do you want to talk about Dan Abrams’ wardrobe? I’m leaning more towards the wardrobe. Blue is really his colour.

Alright, alright! I’ll stop.

yas checking out GIF by Vanessa Marie Carter
Continue reading “Review: Dark Game (DI Kelly Porter, #1) by Rachel Lynch”

Booknerd Wednesday: The House That Jack Built & Bookish Choices

Here’s a little-known secret about me. And by “little known”, I mean literally no one knows it, not even my husband.

I love Matt Dillon.

I keep it a secret because my love for him is complicated to explain. I actually I find him really gross. There’s something about Matt Dillon that is so incredibly off-putting to me; something smarmy, something that tells me he probably has weird sexual proclivities. I can totally see myself saying, “Um, no Matt Dillon, I will not have sex with you covered in mayo!”

Maybe it’s the roles I’ve seen him in that have coloured my opinion – Wild Things, There’s Something About Mary. But I find him to be very unattractive…so much so that I also want him.

matt dillon 80s GIF

I know, it’s weird. Maybe I’ll talk about it in therapy.

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Review: The Last Mrs. Parrish by Liv Constantine

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Harper | 2017

“What we’ve got here is a failure to communicate.” 

This quote from the 1967 film, COOL HAND LUKE, basically sums up how I’m feeling after reading this book. And I’ve never even seen the movie. The quote just came to me, as a thing I know somehow, deep from within the pop culture recesses of my mind. There’s a lot of useless information in there.

I might also go with: “…in the galaxy of This Sucks Camel Dicks!” Stepbrothers, 2008.

What I mean to say is: I wish the publishers hadn’t stuffed this novel into the psychological-thriller genre just because that’s where all the cool kids are, and had instead been honest about what this book is: a dark romance meets women’s fiction meets soap opera intrigue with a terrible, TERRIBLE message.

It’s not a thriller. I’m sorry, but no. I am not thrilled.

Had I known this from the start, I would have passed on reading it, because this level of dramatic soap-opera nutty-ness is just not my thing. It lacks humour and humanity, and is overpopulated with terrible one-liners, cliches and silly dialogue and tropes that feel like a reenactment. And the writing is derivative and basic.

Not to mention, the internal misogyny that permeates the entire theme gets my feminist hackles up.

Anyway… I didn’t know I shouldn’t read this, so I did, and now I have library late fees and a shitty review to write, so buckle in, bitches!

(This could get mildly spoiler-y because I’m going to rant, so if you’re super excited to read this, here’s my takeaway: Don’t waste your time with this, unless you’re cool with domestic abuse being legitimized. Otherwise, read on!)

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Book Tag: The Ultimate Book Tag – 25 Bookish Questions

IT’S FRIDAY!

ken block friday GIF by Ford

Bonus for me: I’ve got Monday off work. I’m determined to make this weekend super productive for reading! It’s top priority.

I’d say last night was pretty productive for reading, as well, because I literally had no other choice. When I got home from work around 5PM, the power was out at my house, as well as 223 other houses. And we didn’t get electricity back until this morning! Joy-of-fucking-joys!

I felt like an Amish person – lighting candles, walking around in the dark, crying that we have no Wi-Fi (Amish people cry about that, right?)

As expressed by my 14-year-old stepkid: “I want to look at memes! This sucks!”

I hear you, junior.

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Booknerd Wednesday: The NetGalley Monthly for May 2018

Honestly, NetGalley might be my undoing, mentally. I can see a breakdown on the horizon. Maybe I start writing on the walls about how many unread ARCs I have, while I talk to an invisible librarian, and my husband has to feed me ice chips.

I try to stop myself from going on there and requesting new titles, but it’s so hard. I need a 12 step program.

We’ll call this post Step 1.

If you want to play along, feel free. Basically, what I intend to do is round up all the new ARCs I’ve received at the beginning of every month, for a new month of reading. Easy!

Because I’ve been such a good girl about requesting books (up until a couple of days ago), this first post might be a little short, but books are books!

studying high school GIF

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Booknerd Wednesday: WWW Edition

I know everyone else is saying this too but, I can’t believe it’s May already!

April flew passed me, and I didn’t even get all that much reading done, which totally sucks, but I’ve been up to my eyes in house stuff. I swear time is like a downhill snowball the older you get, and I’m not even old!

My husband and I are still trying to get this foyer mudroom finished. And I’m such an inpatient asshole that I also started painting my upstairs hallway. I’m not good at one step at a time, clearly. Also, also, I’ve spent a lot of money on paintings and lights and carpets and please someone STOP ME BEFORE I DESTROY MY BUDGET!

*deep breath*

Anyway…

I took a vacation day from work on Monday and my sincerest hope is that we get something completely done this weekend so I can go back to reading.

Speaking of reading, it’s WWW time!


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Fave Five: Favourite Book Series

I’m an unabashed book series lover. If a book is the first in a series, as opposed to a standalone, I’m 80% more likely to read it (I just pulled that percentage out of my ass, but it’s probably accurate.)

30 rock good job GIF

With that in mind, I have no idea how I’m going to whittle down my favourite series to just my top five, but at the very least an attempt will be made and I’m proud of myself for that.

This post is hosted by Sheri @ TV Addicted Bookworm. She seems nice, check her out.

Without further ado, and in no particular order…actually in a very specific order…here are my choices. Trust me when I say, this was agonizing in the most bookish way.


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Booknerd Wednesday: WWW Edition…Plus the “YOU” trailer!

Hey Booknerds! It’s halfway through my work week, so it’s time to celebrate…

And in fact, I do have a treat for you! Hands up if you read 2014’s You by Caroline Kepnes…

*Raises hand*

I read the sequel, too. And I’m going to be all over the third instalment if there ever is one. The series has its ups and downs for me in terms of pop culture diatribe, canon characterization and plot points, but Joe is a character that has left an indelible mark on my bookworm soul and I just can’t not be involved with him. Yay for double negatives!

Continue reading “Booknerd Wednesday: WWW Edition…Plus the “YOU” trailer!”