Review: Any Man by Amber Tamblyn

35068781★★★★★ (times infinity)

Opening Hook: Lorena Bobbitt-esque

Main Character: Exceptionally unique voices

Plot Twisty-ness: Stunning in its simplicity, ravenous in its message.


This book is unlike anything I have ever read, and I am utterly emotionally ruined by it.

Seriously. This book has fucked me up.

I started reading this in the morning and I didn’t put it down until I read the last page that evening. I was completely obsessed, completely enthralled and emotionally enamoured.

I’ve taken a couple of days to think about this review because I want it to be coherent and not preachy, but I’m definitely about to go on a rant of epic proportions filled with long quotes, so buckle up buttercups.

This is the story of five men, all of whom have been the victim of a serial rapist known as Maude. It is the story of how the media handles rape, how society handles rape. How we speak about it, how we shame, how we lay blame. It’s about the questions we ask, how we ask them and the assumptions we make. How we try to make ourselves feel more comfortable in the presence of someone else’s trauma. How the survivors grapple with their new reality, and their upended perception of themselves, their relationships and the world around them.

It’s about gender equality and gender roles and gender assumptions. It’s about the groups we align ourselves with, the lines in the sand we draw as tribes. The hate we have. The resentment we have. How women feel about our social history and how it doesn’t matter until it happens to a man. It’s about how blind we are to our shared wants and needs. And how if we just worked together we could change things.

It’s also creepy with elements of suspense.

Continue reading “Review: Any Man by Amber Tamblyn”

Review: The Good Girl by Mary Kubica

34845523★★½

Opening Hook: Let my attention wonder to playing mindlessly on my phone

Main Character: Three times the boring

Plot Twisty-ness: Existing, but tamed


After all of the glowing reviews I’ve seen for Mary Kubica, this was actually a bit of a disappointment.

Whomp, whomp

Someone has paid to have Mia kidnapped. Colin, her kidnapper, is hired to do the dirty work. But instead of taking her to his boss, he whisks Mia away to a remote cabin and keeps her for himself.

As one would if they were kidnapping another human being.

My god, doesn’t it just seem like SO MUCH WORK? Who would want to kidnap someone?

Like, I get home from work and all I want to do is take off my bra and lay facedown on my mattress while I make ughhhhh ohhhsd nooooo noises and eventually my husband asks me what’s wrong and I can trick him into rubbing my back.

The LAST thing I want to do, is come home from work and have to take care of a person chained in my basement, stinking up the place. Getting their dirty, unwashed butt on stuff. Then you have to empty their piss pots and make them food.

No, thank you. You have to be a special kind of psychopath to want to abduct someone for the “joy” of getting to take care of an adult sized baby.

I am far too lazy for that.

Continue reading “Review: The Good Girl by Mary Kubica”

Review: The Dry (Aaron Falk, #1) by Jane Harper

28220971★★★

Opening Hook: I didn’t want to be involved as much as the lead didn’t

Main Character: Reluctant hero, personality missing

Plot Twisty-ness: You know who did it


Ok I’ll do it! I’ll go against the majority on this one! HERE I COME MARTYRDOM.

But really, I have to say I found The Dry, to be, well, rather dry.

Yeah, the writing is technically good. The characters are fleshed out enough. The setting was different from the usual for me. There was a crime with mystery to it. Past and present story lines were interwoven, and that can be tricky to do.

So, on the surface it checked all the boxes.

But, I just found it kind of boring. Again, I gotta say dry.

I think perhaps I’m not a huge fan of cold case style mystery – where the predominant crime is old or closed. There’s no real crime scene to immerse yourself in. There’s no immediacy to the investigation.

And both crimes in this book fit this category, but the attention each was given felt lopsided. The murders of the Hadler family was the most recent, it is what pulled Falk back to his shitty hometown. This is what he’s supposed to be investigating, it’s where the red herrings and misdirection come into play, but the characters seemed too emotionally focused on the death of Falk’s friend Ellie from 20 years ago, while no one cared too much about Luke except for his parents.

Continue reading “Review: The Dry (Aaron Falk, #1) by Jane Harper”

Review: The Drowned Girls (Angie Pallorino, #1) by Loreth Anne White

31340014★★★★½

Opening Hook: Protect your lady-bits

Main Character: Sex-addict realness

Plot Twisty-ness: Procedural B+


I’m telling you right now, this book is the motherfucking shit.

Not even an exaggeration, honey.

And it’s the shit for one reason. Yes, it’s got murder. Yes, it’s got sex. Yes, it’s got a psycho serial killer. Yes, it’s hitting that fine line in the level of detail. Yes, it reads like real life honesty. Yes, it’s got gore. Yes, it takes place in C to the A to the N to the A to the D to the A…

Hold on, did I spell that right? *goes back to check* Yep.

CANADA!

But listen to me readers and lovers, without Detective Angie Pallorino as a lead character we would be sitting at a three star rating That’s just the truth.

Was there anything astonishing about the story line? Not really. It’s interesting, but at the end of the day it’s a police procedural. Extra points for taking place in Canada and getting my patriotic self a little hyped about that, because I’m always reading books that take place in the UK or the US – and quite honestly I’ve had just about enough of the United States at this CRAZY Trump Juncture – but, I’m pretty sure serial killers obsessed with religious bullshit has been done to death.

But do you know what’s not done to death?

Serial killers obsessed with religious bullshit who are being hunted by Angie Pallorino.

Alison Brie Kiss GIF by GLOW Netflix

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True Crime Tuesday: A Graphic Novel Murder

Gooooood morning friends, lovers, Vietnam and strangers! It’s my favourite day of the blogging week once again, True Crime Tuesday! *crowd goes wild*

Today I’ve got a cracker of a case to share. I’ve been obsessing over it all weekend as the trial just started so there’s lots of new information spilling out.

…but first, a joke:

Image may contain: text

This might actually be my new favourite serial killer joke. Yes, that’s a thing I’m allowed to have a favourite of. My previous favourite was:

Q: What does Jeffrey Dahmer sing while he’s making his lunch?

A: My bologna has a first name…

Classic.

And now that’s you’re in a good mood, let’s completely ruin that, shall we?

Continue reading “True Crime Tuesday: A Graphic Novel Murder”

Booknerd Wednesday: WWW Edition…Plus the “YOU” trailer!

Hey Booknerds! It’s halfway through my work week, so it’s time to celebrate…

And in fact, I do have a treat for you! Hands up if you read 2014’s You by Caroline Kepnes…

*Raises hand*

I read the sequel, too. And I’m going to be all over the third instalment if there ever is one. The series has it’s ups and downs for me in terms of pop culture diatribe, canon characterization and plot points, but Joe is a character that has left an indelible mark on my bookworm soul and I just can’t not be involved with him. Yay for double negatives!

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Review: The Woman in the Window by A.J. Finn

“Something’s happening to me, through me, something dangerous and new. It’s taken root, a poison tree; it’s grown, fanning out, vines winding round my gut, my lungs, my heart.”

34848682★★★★★

I went into this reading experience with full blown anxiety triggered by a library return date breathing down my neck.

I assumed there was not enough time for me to get through this because my weekend included my in-laws staying over and a front hall closet renovation. I decided to try anyway, because I ain’t no quitter. I opened this Saturday night, so completely aware that I had a Monday morning deadline that I got a little high first to set my nerves.

And guess what bitches!? I blew through this baby so hard I gave myself TMJ.

(My TMJ is a true story, but it’s not the book I blew through that gave it to me.)

Look, the truth is that this is not a groundbreaking novel, or even particularly original in it’s overall concept. I see a lot of middle-of-the-road reviews from my friends who just didn’t get into it, who thought it was overhyped and underwhelming and I understand. I think those reviews had a “Lowered Expectations” effect on me, because I FUCKING LOVED THIS BOOK.

Image result for lowered expectations gif

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Booknerd Wednesday: My Real Life Creepy Story & Mystery Writing Exercise

I grabbed this off of Goodreads and I think we have to do it for obvious reasons that are so obvious I’m not even going to list them.

But, this would be a kind of short post if it was all we did, so I figure let’s turn it into a bit of a creative writing exercise! And why not? We’re all either in love with novels or secretly wishing to write one, or both!

This is Booknerd Wednesday – we can do whatever the hell we want around here, like we’re guests on the Maury show.

So, Step One: Find the title of your mystery bestseller…

1522092279-1522092279_goodreads_misc.png

My bestselling mystery novel is…… *unenthusiastic drum roll*

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Review: Into The Black Nowhere (UNSUB, #2) by Meg Gardiner

35157879★★★★★

OKAY, FIRST OF-FUCKING-ALL: YASSS Queen YAS!

And second: I’m so depressed this is over.

I’m not religious, but over this Easter weekend I’ve decided I worship at the printing press of Meg Gardiner. And her books are my bible.

If you’re interested in my new religion, let me know. Maybe I’ll make some pamphlets.

I’m completely blown away by this instalment in the UNSUB series. I think I literally peed my pants over the first one, and it seemed a completely impossible task that an author would deliver an equally pee-pants worthy followup.

But, I’m peeing my pants right now. (Not really. I’m at work. No one would appreciate that.)

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Booknook Sunday: 03.18.18

Happy Sunday, y’all! How were your weekends? Let me tell you about mine…

Saturday I hit up the Book Outlet with my mom in St. Catharines. They were having their annual box sale. What’s a box sale you might ask?! Well!!! It’s where they give a giant box like you’re moving, and you get to fill it with books for $35!

I know, it’s amazing. And I wish I could have taken you all with me. I might do a post about my spoils later.

For now though, I’ve got all these new books (and hundred of others I already had boxed away) and still no real place to put them. Damn housing renovations take so long! I wish everything went as fast as an hour episode of something on HGTV.

So let’s take a few minutes to appreciate the beautiful book nooks people are creating for themselves. Drool and envy and daydream, lovers!

Continue reading “Booknook Sunday: 03.18.18”