True Crime Tuesday: The Christmas Eve Murder of Za’Zell Preston

Please read the “TCT Disclaimer” under the True Crime tab at the top of the page before reading any true crime posts.

Happy Holidays, weirdos… and also regular people who are not sure how they ended up on my blog but are reading this anyway! All are welcome. Except for assholes. I have a strict no-assholes policy around here. I have a sign made out of cardboard and Sharpie on my office door and everything. My cat, as she is wont to do, keeps ignoring it. Maybe I need to edit it. No Assholes ALLOWED… also no one who poops on my carpets ALLOWED!

But also she can’t read. So…

Cat Smoking GIF by sheepfilms

This will be my one and only true crime post for December, but considering I haven’t written one since July, it’s kind of like a Christmas miracle, if Christmas miracles look like me just doing a thing I said I would do.

With that in mind, I want to say Hey Girl, hey! to Brandie, who messaged me recently about these true crime posts, because I have honestly been wondering for a while if I should keep writing these or just ditch that part of my blog altogether. Sometimes messages from readers come at such serendipitous times.

Now, here I am with a new post! Appreciate you, Brandie!

So, before we get into it, there are a couple things I want to make clear. One, I will be trying my best to not make any distasteful Weekend at Bernie’s references, but if you think it, just know I thought it, too. But we both know we’re not making fun of the victim (because we don’t make jokes at the victim’s expense around here,) but instead are mocking the fucking idiot killer who thought that shit would work.

Secondly, yes, the murdering piece of fucking shit is named William Wallace. Obviously, he is not the historical figure who Mel Gibson’s portrayed in Braveheart.

Because when it comes to this case, a Scottish knight would NEVER.

CW: domestic violence.

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