I like the idea of this tag because I function from honesty always….but also because it reminds me of being on MySpace in the early 2000s #emo.
If you are familiar with my reviews, or the general things I write around here, it’s not going to come as a surprise to you that I can be very straightforward with my opinions and thoughts. And in the spirit of my honest principle (different from the pleasure principle) I’m going to be straight with you: This tag is lonnnggggg.
And it will only be interesting to you, if you a) want to know more about me to better stalk me via the internet, or b) think I’m funny and want to see what crazy shit comes out of my mouth.
I’ll try to keep my answers short and
bitter sweet so it doesn’t take you as long to read as it did for me to write it.
1. What’s your name?
Krystin Rachel [Redacted] I’m not making it that easy for the stalkers. I’m not stoopid.
2. Any nicknames or aliases?
Friends call me Krys, my parents still call me my childhood nickname – Muffin. Don’t laugh. My alias, when the day comes that I must go into hiding, is Anastasia Beaverhousen.
3. Your gender?
I’m cis-female. So you know, nothing special.
4. Your star sign?
Scorpio rising and sun. Capricorn moon. And I fucking love astrology. I know Scorpio is a scary sign tp some, and I like it that way.
5. How old are you?
I’m a November 1985 model. You can do the math.
6. Your relationship status?
Married October 13, 2013.
7. Any children?
Two stepkids, 15 and 18. Bio-kids is, at this point, not a thing I’m interested in doing.
8. Any pets?
My cat, Tiny Monster. She’s a black long-haired domestic, who just celebrated her 7th birthday. And my boy, Finnegan. He’s a ginger Cavapoo puppers that we brought home last June. He’s my smooshy-floofy-monkey-baby-poopers and I LOVE HIM SO MUCH.
9. Any tattoos or piercings?
I have five tattoos (plus one I covered up) and my ears have 13 piercings, including my tragus. I used to have my tongue pierced but when I turned 30 I took it out. It had been ten years. It was time. That’s a younger woman’s game.
10. What do you like about yourself?
Mostly everything? And what I don’t like I try to work on instead of being down about, but it took me well into my late twenties to get to that place of personal acceptance. I take pride in the fact that I’m intelligent and empathetic, mostly.
11. What do you dislike about yourself?
My thighs and the arguments I have in my head about the issues that are taking over my thoughts. It gets exhausting.
12. Righty or lefty?
Right-handed. It’s kind of weird that I have one hand that is essentially less intelligent than the other.
13. The last thing you drank:
14. The last thing you ate:
A protein bar. The breakfast of
champions people who oversleep for work.
15. Your last phone call:
An electrician. I was looking for a quote to do some lighting work in my house. (I hope you weren’t expecting these kinds of answers to be interesting.)
16. Your last text message:
Complaining between my husband and me about being tired because we stayed up way later than we should have watching Dexter.
17. Your last email:
A work thing. We’re all blogging from work, right? RIGHT?!
18. The last song you listened to:
It amps me up and I was dead tired driving in to work this morning.
19. The last book you read:
I just finished A French Quarter Violet by EJ Findorff and The Lies They Tell by Gillian French. Reviews are forthcoming.
20. The last time you cried:
We had a date night last week to see Adrift. That shit got me in the end. I hate crying inoublic.
21. The last blog you read:
Use Your Words, tagged at the top. I read her answers to this tag.
22. The last person you spoke to:
A colleague. Seriously, I’m at work.
23. The last place you visited:
We spent a weekend in Toronto for our anniversary last year for the Just For Laughs festival. We don’t get out too much.
24. Your last holiday abroad?
Yeah, no that’s not a thing for millennials. Haven’t you heard? Our only indulgence is avocado toast.
🔪HAVE YOU EVER
25. Have you ever gotten back with an ex?
Yes. It was an abusive relationship. It took me a long time to figure out how to leave and stay gone.
26. Have you ever been cheated on?
Yes. Same abusive ex. He cheated all the time. If I didn’t believe his lies, holes were punched in the walls or I was assaulted, etc. So after a while I just let him have sex with other people because then at least he wasn’t touching me.
27. Have you ever cheated on someone?
I suppose you could consider it emotional cheating. But I was trapped in the aforementioned relationship, so my feelings for this other person I had met didn’t feel like cheating. It felt like that was the real relationship and the abusive one was a prison. If that makes sense.
28. Have you ever lost someone special to you?
I lost friendships because of that bad relationship. But in terms of those passed away, I’ve been pretty lucky in my life so far *knock on wood* that I’ve not experienced many significant losses. My grandmother on my dad’s side died two years ago. She was pretty special to all of us. I felt that loss very deeply.
29. Have you ever been so drunk you threw up?
Isn’t that a right of passage when going from kid to teenager to adult? I think the worst it ever happened was at my 21st birthday party. Vodka and Redbull shots. I got so drunk I couldn’t stand up or speak. And I threw up everywhere. In the bar bathroom, in cups on the bar, on the floor of the booth, in the planter boxes outside, in a shopping bag on the car ride home. I’m pretty sure I was borderline on having alcohol poisoning. I only remember that night in flashes, some things are foggy memories that I’m sure are real. I stopped drinking after that pretty much. I’ll have a glass of wine at a girls’ night or something, but “getting drunk” isn’t fun anymore.
30. Have you ever fallen out of love with someone?
I’d never truly been in love until I met my husband. And I still love him… so, no.
31. Have you ever met someone who changed you?
Of course! Anyone you meet has something to teach you. I’ve learned lots of things about myself through friendships, family, people online and romantic relationships.
32. Have you ever been in a situation where you found out who your real friends are?
I think so. But I’m super selective about my friends and I feel like I’ve made good choices most of my life in terms of who I trust. I’m definitely not a social butterfly.
33. Have you ever kissed someone you probably shouldn’t have?
No. I’ve always kept strong boundaries that way. You know, because I’m very off-putting.
34. Have you ever found out people were talking about you behind your back?
Oh please! Of course. One, I used to be a teenage girl which is the worst for that. But just in general everyone talks about everyone. I do it. You do it. Anyone who says they don’t “gossip” is full of shit. It doesn’t bother me. It’s human nature.
35. Have you ever broken someone’s heart?
Romantically, I doubt it. But otherwise, my mother has said that to me a number of times over the choices I made as a young adult. I don’t blame her. I’ve made some big mistakes.
36. Have you ever kissed a stranger?
37. Have you ever had your own heart broken?
I used to think so, in the moment, when my ex would do something awful to me. But I know now I wasn’t heartbroken. You need to have love for someone for them to break your heart. My husband is a good man, who loves me more than I probably deserve. He’s never hurt me.
38. Have you ever had sex on a first date?
Yes. Then I married him.
39. Have you ever been arrested?
No, I’ve never done anything that warranted it. But I’ve probably done things that would have gotten me a ticket or citation if I’d been caught. I’m scared of getting in trouble usually.
40. Have you ever been attracted to someone that isn’t the gender you usually find attractive?
Sexually, no. But intellectually, yes.
41. Have you ever done something you regret?
Yes. But also no at the same time. Any choice I made that was a mistake ended up leading me to my husband and the life I have now. So how can I regret that?
42. Have you ever had a threesome?
Noooooo. I’m way too possessive to share.
43. Have you ever embarrassed yourself in public?
Who hasn’t!? We’re all human. We all do dumb, embarrassing shit. You just have to laugh about it and move on.
44. Have you ever misjudged someone?
🔪YOUR BELIEFS AND OPINIONS
45. Do you believe in god?
I was raised Christian, but I fall into the atheist category now. So no, I don’t.
46. Do you believe in yourself?
Who else is going to if I don’t?
47. Do you believe in Santa Claus?
My parents really pushed the Santa thing. We had a chimney and my dad would make footprints and leave glitter that was “elf dust” and gnaw on carrots like Rudolph had done it. I definitely remember that part of my childhood feeling so magical. I loved it. If I had kids of my own I would do the same. I was ten when my cousins ruined it for me.
48. Do you believe in ghosts?
Like civil war soldiers totally sentient, just walking around in the ghost form? No. If that were the case what about people who have died more recently? Why is no one being haunted by ghosts who need the WiFi password? I think I might believe in some kind of energy that can inhabit locations. But it’s not a thing I give too much thought to.
49. Do you believe in aliens?
The observable universe is estimated to contain between 200 billion and 2 trillion galaxies. How fucking self-involved do we have to be to believe we’re the only things alive in it? Or that some man in the sky created it all for us and is granting wishes? Silly. In the traditional sense of little green men, I’m not sure I believe that. But there’s got to be something else alive out there, even if it’s just a small organism/bacteria.
50. Do you believe in miracles?
Miracles are defined as something magical happening that can’t be explained by science or reason. So no, I don’t believe those exist for real. Anything like a “medical miracle” is just a medical happening that we can’t completely explain yet. Science is still learning. All other miracles seemed to have stopped happening after the invention of the video camera. Go figure.
51. Do you believe in the power of positive thinking?
As in thinking really hard can make something happen? No. But I do believe that being positive attracts positive things to you – that energy I don’t totally understand, again. Something along the lines of manifestation. I also think that being positive can have a placebo effect on people. Being positive can make us do better, and maybe accomplish things we otherwise wouldn’t if we were thinking “I can’t” the whole time.
52. Do you believe in love at first sight?
I believe we can recognize, biologically, when we are super attracted to someone on a primal level, and that it can feel like love. But real love takes time. It’s built over years. Real love is based on acceptance of flaws, and you don’t find that at first sight.
53. Can money make you happy?
Me, personally? YES. Other people might feel differently. Just look at Robin Williams or Anthony Bourdain. RIP.
54. Would you describe yourself as a feminist?
55. Are you pro-life or pro-choice?
Pro-choice. As a feminist, you need to allow all women that personal choice, even if you morally object to it yourself. (But I don’t morally object either.)
56. Do you have strong political beliefs?
I have strong principles and I gravitate towards a political party that is best going to fit those principles. But I have no political loyalty.
57. Do you have strong religious beliefs?
I have zero religious beliefs.
58. What do you think the most important thing you can give a child is?
Room to figure out who they are and to feel accepted in those revelations so that they feel no need to hate others based on the colour of their skin, sexual orientation etc.
59. Are you eating anything right now?
60. Are you drinking anything right now?
61. What are you listening to right now?
Office radio. Stupid fucking retirement light rock.
62. What are you thinking about right now?
That I should be doing some actual work. I’m such a slacker today.
63. What are you waiting for right now?
64. What are you most excited about right now?
65. What’s your pet peeve right now?
Alt-right political bullshit.
66. What’s your favourite thing right now?
Getting high and binge watching The Office.
67. If you weren’t answering these questions, what would you be doing right now?
Finding another way to avoid doing actual work.
68. Your first best friend:
My cousin, from babies to early adulthood. Our lives have taken us in different directions at this point.
69. Your first kiss:
Kindergarten. A mutual crush slid down the slide and planted one on me. It was definitely the most swag way someone has ever kissed me. A more adult first kiss was at 14 with a guy I hated during a game of Truth or Dare.
70. Your first celebrity crush:
Garth Brooks. John Travolta. But, when I was old enough to get really into the crush? Scott Moffatt when I was 12. I was such a fucking freak for him that I scratched his name into my arm with a math compass so that it would turn into a scar. My teen-bop version of scarification. True story.
71. Your first holiday:
We went to Disney World and Universal Studios when I was 10. When we got back my parents announced they were getting a divorce. They had wanted to leave us with a good memory before breaking up our family. I am not bitter. They had good intentions.
72. Your first pet:
A Poodle/Shi-tzu cross named Punky. She was hit by a car when I was in first grade. My porn name is Punky Exiter. And I think that’s fabulous. Sounds like I should do anal.
73. Your first regret:
Probably my disinterest in high school. I could have done a lot more if I’d tried. Who knows where I’d be right now if I had.
74. Your first job:
I used to babysit. Then I worked as a cashier in a little grocery store during high school.
75. Your first childhood memory:
I have no fucking idea. All my childhood memories are mixed together. I don’t know what happened first or last or in between.
76. Love or money?
Before meeting my husband I’d have said money. Now that I’m married I’d still say money, but I do so because I already have love. That’s not greedy.
77. Twitter or Facebook?
Twitter. Facebook used to be cool when I was in college. Now it’s just full of old family members who share memes without researching the information and people who comment “libtard” on every news article. It’s not a fun place to be.
78. Hook-up or Relationship?
I’ve always been a relationship girl. I’m far too loyal and far too jealous for anything else.
79. Dogs or Cats?
Tie. Dogs are more emotionally fulfilling, but higher maintenance. I don’t need a sitter for my cat. Cats are independent, but you get fur everywhere and you have to clean a litterbox.
80. Coffee or Tea?
81. Beer or Wine?
Wine. Bearflag. It’s a California wine though, so I can’t buy it anymore until Trump lifts his tariffs.
82. Sweet or Savoury?
Depends on my mood, but usually savoury. You don’t get a body like mine without the help of a bag of chips for dinner.
83. Introvert or Extrovert?
I’m severely introverted. Like I need to take breaks in a quiet room during family gatherings. I’ve got 3 hours in me tops because I start freaking out.
84. Vampires of Werewolves?
I’m a Buffy girl to my core, so I have to go with Vampires. Specifically something like Bram Stoker’s Dracula or Anne Rice’s Lestat. I was terrified of them as a young girl. I’d do that thing where if you pull the blanket up to your chin they can’t get you. Impenetrable blanket neck guard! I was an idiot.
85. Seaside or Countryside?
I’ll pick the seaside until the icebergs melt and everything slowly becomes submerged by the oceans. Then I’ll move to the country. In a bunker.
86. Summer or Winter?
87. Books or Movies?
I lean towards books. As long as I still get TV shows.
88. Horror or Comedy?
I love horror movies deeply. Sometimes you just need to laugh to unwind, but that’s where horror-comedies come in.
89. Do you wish you could change your past?
Like, I wish I’d never stopped the diet I was on before my wedding. I’d be smokin’ right now.
90. What’s your dream job?
91. What’s your guilty pleasure?
I can’t say I have one. If I like a thing, I don’t judge myself for it. Unless it was a Jeffrey Dahmer kind of pleasure – which it’s not – but it if were, there would be lots of guilt.
92. What are you afraid of?
Driving on highways next to transport trucks.
93. What was the first thing you wanted to be when you grew up?
The pink Power Ranger.
94. If you could have any super power, what would it be?
Whenever I needed money, I could just think about it and it would show up in my bank account.
95. If you could change anything about your life what would it be?
That I keep not winning the lottery. (I also don’t play the lottery, so that doesn’t help.)
96. Would you want immortality?
I don’t think so. It would be lonely unless we were all doing it, but if we all did it, it would suck. I wouldn’t mind if science invented some way for us to live longer without ageing so rapidly.
97. If you could interview anyone alive or dead, who would you choose?
The Zodiac Killer. First question: Who are you?
98. Would you say you are happy?
I think people make the mistake of thinking “being happy” is a destination, that you just need to get through the obstacles and tasks and unfinished business first and then your life will really start and you’ll be happy. But that’s not the case. All of those things are your life. And you do them with happiness. That doesn’t mean things won’t get you down or annoy you, or you won’t have days where you feel like everything just sucks moose dick. It means that you find gratitude for what you have, you live in the moment with friends and family, you accept yourself for who you are. You live. Because time keeps moving whether you’re engaging in your own life or not. So yes, I’m happy. Happy to be alive, grateful to have what I have. I try to appreciate it, make the best of it, even when things suck.
99. What one piece of advice would you give yourself at the age of eighteen?
“No” is a complete sentence. It doesn’t require an explanation.
100. Where would you like to be in five years time?
Sooooo I’m not going to tag anyone in this because it’s so long. I’m not comfortable putting that kind of pressure on any of you precious baby angels. But if you want to do it, tag me so I don’t miss your answers!
Stay safe. Be kind. But, take no shit.
Later, Booknerds ✌️🔪